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PostSubject: Play?   Play? Icon_minitimeFri Jan 12, 2007 11:54 pm

Is anyone interested helping me write a play....I dont ever have to act it out or share it with anyone I just want to write one. Every time I start one I wind up thowing it out bc I dont like it. So if you are interested lemme know! sunny
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PostSubject: Re: Play?   Play? Icon_minitimeSat Jan 13, 2007 1:04 am

What sort of play? I might be able to help. I have some experience, just read what I typed below:

I know how you feel about plays, I've only attempted one so far. It was entitled, "The Assassination of King Tut" and it turned out to be a mess because everyone in my old school found out about it and thought I was actually planning to have it performed. That was pretty embarassing, especially since it was in 6th grade, I was the new kid, it was a tiny Christian school, and my new classmates generally despised anyone who liked any topic that was even remotely "nerdy", ancient civilizations included. Let's just say that the play cursed my reputation for the remainder of the year.
And, in 2005, it was discovered that King Tut was not assassinated after all, automatically outdating my still-unfinished script. At least the new research did give me some more ideas.
Basically, the moral of my story is: 1) Do not show your script or draft to anyone unless they are a fellow writer and swear not to tell anyone else about it til it's finished, and 2) Do your research if you want to write anything historical.

I might post a few lines from what's left of the 2nd draft, if you want me to.
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PostSubject: Re: Play?   Play? Icon_minitimeSat Jan 13, 2007 10:01 am

Ok, I would love to see your some lines from you play.
Thank you for the tips.
I am not really sure what kind of play yet. But I am not really sure if I wanna write one.
If anyone has any ideas, let me know!
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PostSubject: Re: Play?   Play? Icon_minitimeSat Jan 13, 2007 2:41 pm

Here's an idea: I was thinking, maybe you should start w/ just one, happy ending. The problem w/ mine was that I planned for multiple, sad endings and then let the audience choose what the real ending should be. That's where things kinda went crazy.
I will post the lines later, right now, I have to go to the store.
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PostSubject: Re: Play?   Play? Icon_minitimeSat Jan 13, 2007 3:31 pm

Ok thats fun....I am going to have a brainstorm session later and then I will have ideas!
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PostSubject: Re: Play?   Play? Icon_minitimeSat Jan 13, 2007 10:51 pm

In case you're wondering where I got the idea in the first place, check out this now-outdated, but very interesting webpage from Discovery Channel:
http://dsc.discovery.com/anthology/unsolvedhistory/kingtut/kingtut.html

Before I post the lines, here's the cast so you actually know who's saying the lines:
The Children:
-Rosetta
-Laurel
-Sean
-Gloria
The Royal Court:
-Pharaoh Tutankhamun
-Queen Ankhesenamun
-General Horemheb
-Advisor Ay
-Lady Tey (Sister of Ay)
Epilogue Characters:
-Hittite King
-Hittite Prince
-Archaeologist Howard Carter
-Lord Carnarvon

And the scene list:
Introduction- The Real King Tut
Act I:
-Prologue: In the Library
Characters: Children
-Scene 1: Welcome to the Two Lands
Characters: Children, Tut, Ankh, and Tey
-Scene 2: Salute to the General
Characters: Children, Tut, Horemheb
-Scene 3: Introduction to the Advisor
Characters: Children, Tut, Ay, Tey, Ankh
-Scene 4: The Great Royal Wife
Characters: Children, Tut, Ankh
-Scene 5: Sad Tidings
Characters: Rosetta, Tey, Ay, Ankh
1st Intermission
Act II:
-Scene 6: Horemheb's Prey
Characters: Tut, Horemheb
-Scene 7: A Terrible Good-Bye (Thanks to Ay) (lousy title)
Characters: Laurel, Tut, Ay
-Scene 8: The Funeral
Characters: The Court (w/o Tut and Tey), The Children
-Scene 9: Return From Tragedy
Characters: The Children, Ankh
-Scene 10: Fallen Pharaoh
Characters: The Children
Audience Poll- Who Was The Culprit?
2nd Intermission
Poll Results- Scene 6 or 7 re-acted depending on results
Epilogue: The Lore of It All
Characters: All
Bloopers (yes, I made bloopers, even though it's just a play)
Dedication
The End

That was long...


Last edited by on Sun Jan 14, 2007 2:28 am; edited 1 time in total
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PostSubject: Re: Play?   Play? Icon_minitimeSun Jan 14, 2007 1:10 am

...and here's the lines. I forgot to mention that you are allowed to double-post if your writing fills up most of one post and you feel like you need another.
Note: The script only goes up to Scene 3, after that, I kinda abandoned it. How sad. And anything in parentheses is a stage direction.

Prologue:
(The children are seated at desks in a modern library. Rosetta is on a computer, Laurel and Gloria are reading, and Sean is browsing the shelves. Rosetta happens to be wearing a tiny ankh-shaped amulet on her necklace.)

Laurel- (closes book) I'm bored!

Sean- (looks at Laurel) Me, too!

Rosetta- (continues looking at computer) I know, there just doesn't seem to be any- (looks at screen) hey, look what I just found! A website about King Tut!
(Others drop their books and cluster around computer)

Laurel- Cool!

Sean- Awesome!

Gloria- I never knew he was astanated!

Rosetta- Gloria, I think you meant "assassinated". What's this? Hmm...(looks down at ankh amulet)...Something about a golden ankh and the time-space continuum...

Gloria- Huh? What do you mean, Rosi?

Rosetta- My amulet...my parents found it on a dig. Now, let me see what it's supposed to do...(fiddles w/ amulet a little)
(Others look dumbfounded)

Rosetta- (after fiddling w/ the amulet) Ok, people, get within an armslength around me, stare at the amulet, and close your eyes.

(Putting her hand over the amulet, Rosetta closes her eyes, then whispers aomething nearly inaudible. A bright light fills the stage enveloping her and her friends...)


Scene 1:
(After some moments of darkness, the children reappear, dressed in ancient Egyptian clothing, and standing before the gates of the palace of Pharaoh Tutankhamun. Lady Tey notices them and rushes out from behind the gates to greet them.)

Rosetta- (looking around) Guys, I guess I underestimated the amulet...

Tey- Oh, could you be the new apprentices? If so, then welcome to the Great House of Pharaoh Nebkheperere Tutankhamun- life, health, strength!

Laurel- Uh, ma'am, we aren't the-

Tey- No need to explain! My name is Tey, Advisor Ay's sister and grandmother of His Majesty- life, health, strength! Now, please, introduce yourselves!

Rosetta- (looks at others, then looks at Tey) We- we are from the future...

Sean- Erm, yeah, from the future...

Tey- Go on.

Rosetta- Well, I can explain. I sort of played w/ this...(looks down and realizes the ankh is still there)...amulet.

Gloria- And that's how we got here!

Rosetta- (realizes she hasn't said her name) Oh, yeah, my name's Rosetta.

Sean- My name's Sean.

Laurel- I'm Laurel.

Gloria- And I'm Gloria!

Tey- You all seem to be pleasant children, so I will now escort you to the current Son of Horus -life, health, strength! -Pharaoh Tutankhamun!

(The children follow Tey through another huge gateway. They continue walking until they reach the throne room, where they bow to the king and Queen Ankhesenamun)

Tut- (in a friendly tone) Welcome to the Two Lands, dear children. I'm presuming Tey already introduced My Majesty, so why not meet my wife Ankhesenamun? (winks and turns to Ankh)

Gloria- It's very nice to meet you, O Great King and Queen, but do you have any children?

Rosetta- (looks disapprovingly at Gloria) Gloria, don't be so...

Ankh- (friendly tone like her husband, but w/ a hint of sadness) ...rash? She may talk, my husband and I appreciate children's talk, for, no, we have no children of our own. (smile starts fading) It is too painful to talk about...(snaps back to present and smiles again) Oh, yes, the introductions can come later. Tey, please show these children to a room.

(Tey leads the children out of earshot of the royal couple)
Tey- Now, children, just to let you know- (looks behind her, then looks back) well, maybe I should tell you later. As for now, your room is overlooking the incense orchard, which is located to the left of the palace. May the gods bless you- and I must be going! (rushes backstage)

Sean- (breathes sigh of relief) Boy, I'm glad she's gone, all that "life, health, strength!" stuff was getting to be too much!

Rosetta- Sean, keep it down! I agree with you, but the palace guards might not! Anyways, did anyone else notice how sad Queen Ankh seemed to be?

Laurel- Yeah, and I think she mentioned something about being sad because of their children.

Rosetta- That's what I meant. Come on, we can go discuss this in our room! Coming, Gloria?

Gloria- (gives one last look at a wall painting, then runs to catch up with the group) Yep, I'm coming!

(Later, in their bedroom, the children begin to talk on the girls' side of the room. Sean's side of the room is hidden by an elaborate linen curtain.)

Sean- (Sitting on Laurel's bed) Boy, this is such a cool room! Can you imagine the rest of this place?

Rosetta- Believe me, Sean, I don't think I can imagine it. But what really worries me is what's wrong w/ the king and queen. I mean, they both seemed a bit sad.

Gloria- I know! I think it's bad, too!

Laurel- Maybe their own kids died, or-"

(There is a knock at the door. The children fling themselves onto their beds and pretend to be asleep, while Rosetta cautiously answers the door. She then jumps when she sees who it is.)
Rosetta- (wide-eyed) It-it's you, O k-king. What are you doing here? (attempts to bow, but is stopped by the king)

Tut- (looks at Rosetta) That is not necessary right now. What is your name?

Rosetta- I'm Rosetta and my friends are Laurel, Sean, and Gloria, Your Majesty.

Tut- You and your friends can call me Tutankhamun. And there is something I need to tell you. My wife already mentioned it, but perhaps you do not understand. Come close, why are you afraid of me? I...(sniffs, trying to hold back tears)...oh, this is ridiculous, I shouldn't be weeping but I am...

Rosetta- Oh, here, take this (pulls handkerchief from her sash and gives it to the king) What's wrong

Tut- (dries tears and tries to compose himself) Thank you, Rosetta. You see, I have lived a life of sorrow and the moment I saw you children, my heart lifted. You see, my own two children were born dead (pauses as he tries to compose himself again) and dear Ankh and I...we're just no longer happy. And I myself was crowned as a child, because of Smenkhare's death, oh Smenkhare-

Rosetta- Was Smenkhare your father?

Tut- No, but he was a good brother to me. He and Ankh were all I had after Father died. And then they had to crown me...oh, how ridiculous, I'm weeping again...

Rosetta- That's ok, Tutankhamun, that's ok, I'm really sorry for you...

(Light fades away in preparation for Scene 2)



WHEW!!! Now my fingers hurt! Scenes 2 & 3 and the bloopers will be posted tomorrow.
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PostSubject: Re: Play?   Play? Icon_minitimeSun Jan 14, 2007 6:44 pm

wow.....I like it alot alot! That is awesome. I might try to write one this week....at least scene one....then I will post it!
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PostSubject: Re: Play?   Play? Icon_minitimeSun Jan 14, 2007 8:14 pm

Scene 2:
(Several days have passed. The king has calmed down a little, but still seems somewhat depressed. He is currently taking the children on a tour of the palace.)

Tut- (points to offstage area) And here are the royal lavatories...

Horemheb- (yelling from backstage) Your Majesty, if we want to beat those accursed Hittites, we need your royal help!

Tut- Children, it appears that I forgot to introduce you to General Horemheb the other day. Do not challenge him to senet, he will leave you weeping with his strategies. At least it is good news for our soldiers, for the Hittites may be foreigners, but they are horribly strong. Come, follow me.

(Lights darken, then reappear minutes later, revealing Horemheb standing at a tiny desk and examining a scroll. He appears to be in deep thought.)
Horemheb- (in dark tone) Greetings, children! (realizes his mistake and changes to more cheerful tone) His Majesty Himself told me all about you. How goes it today?

Gloria- Ok, sir, but is that your strategy? (points to scroll)

Horemheb- Dear, it's very confidential. (pauses) But I suppose you're not spies, so here. (hands scroll to the children, who pretend to read it as Tut looks on)

Sean- Wow, awesome, I wish I could order my G.I. Joes like that!

Laurel- Now I know what the king meant by strategies!

Sean- See, look, they're all arranged in a phalanx! And I thought the Greeks invented that!

Rosetta- It is interesting, isn't it?

Horemheb- (insincere chuckle) That is the whole purpose of this strategy, dear children!

Tut- (looks at scroll, then looks out a little window) Look at the sun! I intended to discuss something w/ dear Ankhesenamun tonight, so I must be going! May the gods bless you! (rushes to backstage)

Horemheb- (looks to the left and right, then looks at children) Good, he's gone. Now, one of you bolt that door. (Gloria runs to an offstage door and bolts it) Listen carefully, and keep these words a secret. Tutankhamun does not really believe that I should be in charge of the army, even though I have impressive strategies. He thinks, probably because he is pharaoh, that he should be in charge. But I've never seen such an unskilled person- you should see his swordsmanship, ugh!

Laurel- (looking worried) But what are you going to do, sir?

Horemheb- You'll see, children, you'll see...

(stage darkens)


Scene 3:
(Another day has passed. The children seem to have forgotten their strange talk with the general and are observing a group of birds in the palace garden.)

Sean- Such cool-looking birds, I only saw them before in a book!

Rosetta- They're ibises, Sean. The Egyptians revere them as sacred to the god Thoth, who is the god of-

Gloria- (in loud whisper) Quick, everyone bow! The king is coming over here! (The children do as she says)

Tut- I've never seen such respectful children before. I was on my way to meet Ay, (lowers voice to whisper) my great-uncle, (resumes normal tone) to discuss some business, such as the war. Do you wish to come along?

Children- Yes!

Tut- Come, then.

(Stage darkens, then lightens to reveal Ay sitting at a tiny desk, similar to Horemheb's. His sister Tey is hovering over his shoulder. Tut and the children stand nearby.)

Tut- Uncle, I have told you of these children, but now you can meet them. (Points at each as he names them) This is Rosetta, Sean, Laurel, and Gloria.

Ay- (in flattering exclamation) I am delighted to see you children, since Tey has been telling me so much about you. Right, sister? (looks at Tey)

Tey- Right. I haven't seen you children for several (coughs) days. I (coughs again) hope you are- (breaks into fit of coughing)

Ay- (concerned) Tey, what has come upon you?

Tey- I shall (coughs) be fine. All I need is a (coughs again) rest. Good-bye, children...(walks to backstage, coughing all the way)

Ay- I'm afraid she came down with something, hopefully not serious. But the physician should examine her soon. As for now, children, you may stay here or you may wait outside.

Tut- They shall stay, for I invited them. (Ay gives a slight frown, but returns to normal) Now, Uncle, what were you saying?

Ay- I am tired of watching Horemheb's actions against the Hittites. It is costing us too many men. I believe we should live in peace.

Tut- But those Hittites- they've done so much damage to the border. What have we done that makes them want to wrong us? I do not believe it is time for a treaty at all.

Ay- But, royal nephew, I advise you, if we created a treaty-

Tut- (in raised, impulsive voice) No, no, no, the idea's too absurd at this moment! If our losses were far worse, then I would consider it. But no, not now.

Ay- Well, I was simply advising Your Majesty...

(Light fades, then lightens again, to reveal the children and Tut in a corridor outside of Ay's office.)

Tut- Sorry, children, that the meeting did not work out. Uncle may be wise, but I'd keep my wits about me if I were you. He can be quite wily, even though he is my uncle. Aunt Tey is far better behaved, but right now, she is ill. I fear for her...(lightens tone) Oh, yes, I have invited you all to a banquet tonight, with just me and Ankhesenamun. I command you to come.

Rosetta- We will, O king.

Other children- Thank you!

(stage darkens)


Bloopers! (From Prologue to Scene 3)
Prologue:
Laurel- I'm not bored, but I'm sick (coughs)
Tey (from backstage)- Hey, no line-stealing!
Laurel- Sorry...

Scene 1:
Tut- (weeping) Oh, this is ridiculous...(breaks into laughter) Yes, it is...hahahahahaha...

Scene 2:
Horemheb- Greetings, children, I plan to murder- ooh, did I say that? (looks around) Err, anyways...

Scene 3:
Sean- Look at these cool birds! (ibis "poo" falls on his head) Huh? What's this on my head? (reaches to touch it) It feels gross...

Rosetta- (laughing) I think the god of writing is trying to tell you something...

THE END!
Finally, I can cease the incessant typing...
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PostSubject: Re: Play?   Play? Icon_minitimeWed Jan 17, 2007 3:11 pm

wow.....that is amazing. I really like it! You should become a writer when you get older.
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PostSubject: Re: Play?   Play? Icon_minitimeWed Jan 17, 2007 3:16 pm

I probably will, but it will be a hobby, not a job. Professional authors don't make money unless their books are madly popular (ex. J.K. Rowling).
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Number of posts : 138
Age : 32
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PostSubject: Re: Play?   Play? Icon_minitimeThu Jan 18, 2007 7:16 am

Haha....yeah I know.
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